BERNIE (2012)

 Greetings again from the darkness. It’s 1997 in Carthage and a shocking discovery hits smack dab in the middle of town square. That’s rural east Texas where everyone knows everything about everyone. Well almost everything and almost everyone. A year later, Skip Hollandsworth wrote an article for Texas Monthly about the fascinating, too-strange-to-believe story that shook this community. Now, 16 years after the murder, Hollandsworth co-wrote a screenplay with director Richard Linklater and they present a visual representation that allows us to wrap our heads around the events.

Linklater is always an interesting filmmaker. His resume includes Dazed and Confused, and School of Rock. Here he re-teams with Jack Black, who stars at Bernie Tiede, the nicest man in Carthage. You need not take my word for it. Linklater interviews several actual Carthage residents who swear Bernie was the sweetest, most generous man they ever met. Some even state they will never believe he committed the murder … despite his confession. Whatever you think of Mr. Black as an actor, his performance here is unlike any of his previous work. He is somehow subtle and believable while playing a real life over-the-top assistant funeral home director. His walk, speech pattern, mannerisms, interests and singing style tell us all we need know about Bernie Tiede.

The basic story is that Bernie befriends the wealthiest, wickedest widow in town. They become very close as friends, travel partners and even live together. Bernie gains Marjorie Nugent’s trust and is eventually in charge of her finances and written in as her sole beneficiary. What makes this odd? Well, Bernie is 38. Marjorie (played by Shirley MacLaine) is 81. Oh, and he is gay. This odd arrangement somehow is accepted in this community for one reason … he is just so a nice man! He truly is nice. Right up until the point where he’s not so nice.

 This is one of those movies where the links are stronger than the chain. Black’s performance is stellar and worth the price of admission. Equally entertaining are the “interviews” with the local townspeople. And adding intrigue to all of that is the best ever supporting performance from Matthew McConaughey as local DA, Danny Buck Davidson. Those three elements make this oddball movie a sight to behold. There is humor to make us laugh and oddity to raise eyebrows.

The downside is that the docudrama approach actually takes away from what should have been the key aspects of the story. More screen time watching the relationship between Bernie and Marjorie could have proved enlightening. Instead, the development is reduced to snapshots of vacations and a snippet of a couples massage. The dark elements are only hinted at until the shock of the deed.  The filmmakers choose not to dwell on the “other” side of Bernie, and instead play along with the locals version of the nicest man in town.

Movies based on truth are all the more enticing when the characters are themselves quite interesting and different. That’s certainly the case with Bernie Tiede, Danny Buck Davidson, and the locals in Carthage. For a taste of small town East Texas living and dying, questionable morals, battles between legalities and religion, and the hypocrisy and clouded judgment that occurs when a nice guy gets dirty … this is as good as it gets.

SEE THIS MOVIE IF: black comedy immersed in real life tragedy is your thing OR you don’t want to miss a wonderfully odd and touching performance from Jack Black (and lots of hymnal singing)

SKIP THIS MOVIE IF: you don’t apprecaite a murderer being portrayed as a nice guy – even if that’s the TRUE part of the story!

Watch the trailer:

DARK SHADOWS (2012)

 Greetings again from the darkness. If anyone ever asks “What was the name of that late 60′s goth, supernatural soap opera with the cult following?“, it’s safe to assume they mean the TV series “Dark Shadows“. It ran from 1966-1971 for a remarkable 1225 episodes. For those who remember it, the image they recall tends to be actor Jonathan Frid as Barnabus Collins … the first vampire most of us ever saw outside of a Friday night horror film. The series made quite an impact on two young boys in particular: Tim Burton and Johnny Depp.

There are many reasons that movies get made. Pet projects or labors of love are not as common these days because of high production costs. But that’s exactly what this movie is – a pet project for Burton and Depp. They clearly have fun with the characters, and the film dallies ever so closely to the parody line. The initial set-up is brilliant and dark and ominous, leading us to believe this film will be in line with Burton’s Sleepy Hollow or Corpse Bride. Instead, the rest of the movie is more in line with Beetlejuice. Definitely not a bad thing – just different than what we were prepped for.

 Johnny Depp gives a wonderful performance as Barnabus Collins, the rich young man cursed by Angelique, the witch he spurns in love. His curse is to be turned into a vampire and buried alive. When his casket is discovered 196 years later, the world of 1972 is quite different than the one he left. He comically struggles to fit in and make sense of it all … not the least of which is his remaining family. At his beloved Collinswood Manor lives Elizabeth Collins Stoddard (Michelle Pfeiffer), Roger Collins (Jonny Lee Miller), Carolyn Stoddard (Chloe Grace Moretz), David Collins (Gulliver McGrath), the live-in child psychiatrist Dr Hoffman (Helena Bonham Carter), and their recently hired nanny Victoria (Bella Heathcote). While he was buried, the wicked witch Angelique (Eva Green) becomes the most powerful figure in town.  Ms. Green holds nothing back in her over-the-top jealous witch fun.

 Burton does a nice job poking fun at the 1970′s with comedy that won’t mean much to today’s youngsters, but will hit home with those from the era. The art direction and sets are terrific, especially Collinwood Manor. The music of the 70′s is used to comic effect, including a live performance by Alice Cooper. Michelle Pfeiffer does the best job at capturing the look and feel of the original series, but her daughter’s character (Moretz) takes an unnecessary turn as Burton tries to cram as much in as possible. In fact, the film is actually quite fun to watch, but is lacking real substance in the story department … not dissimilar to the original series.

 This is the 8th film collaboration between Burton and Depp. They make a wonderful team, and Depp has added another entertaining character to his Captain Jack Sparrow, Edward Scissorhands, Mad Hatter legacy. His movements and speech pattern are especially entertaining as we are mesmerized by his milky white complexion. His dialogue (written by Seth Grahame-Smith) demands attention and is both comical and majestic simultaneously. Burton’s tribute to the TV series includes cameos by four of the original actors: Kathryn Leigh Scott, Lara Parker, David Selby, and the recently deceased Jonathan Frid (pictured left) as guests at the ball. It’s a classy touch. Danny Elfman’s score is a bit overwhelmed by the use of numerous 70′s classics, and it was disappointing to hear The Killers version of “Go All the Way” rather than The Raspberries as the closing credits rolled.

Burton is one of the more visual directors and even though the story is a bit lacking, each scene gives us plenty to absorb. The ghosts are especially well done, as is the fishing town of Collinsport which was built just for the movie. It has many similarities to Bodega Bay, which film lovers will recognize as the setting for Hitchcock’s The Birds. Lastly, Burton gives us another scene with the great Christopher Lee – this time as a boat captain caught between Angelique and Barnabus. Good stuff.

SEE THIS MOVIE IF: you are a fan of the original TV series OR you enjoy Burton/Depp collaborations OR you “get” 1970′s humor

SKIP THIS MOVIE IF: in your mind, the 1970′s have as much relevance as 1870

watch the trailer:

THE BEST EXOTIC MARIGOLD HOTEL (2012)

 Greetings again from the darkness. The closest I can come to saying anything negative about the film is that it is a bit predictable, and I wish we had time to get to better explore these characters. That said, it is quite an entertaining ride to take with some of Britain’s finest actors. Filled with both comedy and insight, the Ol Parker script of the Deborah Moggach novel (“These Foolish Things”) may be the jump start to a new film genre … gray cinema.

In the pre-opening credit sequence, we get introductions to seven Brits who are all at a crossroads in life … each past the career stage (either voluntarily or otherwise) but not ready to disappear into a meaningless existence waiting to die. They each respond to an advertisement for a hotel in Jaipur, India which caters to the “elderly and beautiful”. Its biggest selling point is probably the low cost of retirement. Still, it’s an adventure of the scale most of our heroes have never taken.

We meet Evelyn (Judi Dench) as the recent widow who discovers her beloved husband left her a mountain of debt; Douglas and Jean (Bill Nighy and Penelope Wilton) a hapless married couple who have invested their savings into their daughter’s internet company; Muriel (Maggie Smith) is a racist and longtime housekeeper for the rich who has been put out to pasture while in need of a new hip; Graham (Tom Wilkinson) is a high court judge who is fed up with responsibility and seeking to reconnect with a long ago lover; Madge (Celia Imrie) and Norman (Ronald Pickup) are the lonely hearts looking for love, or in his case, loving.

 They arrive at the Indian resort to be met by its proprietor Sonny, a wildly exuberant and overly optimistic Dev Patel (Slumdog Millionaire). Sonny has inherited the rundown property from his father and has huge dreams of turning it into a showplace for retirees from abroad … he literally wants to outsource old age for all the countries who have no use for the elderly. A sad truth for both the English and Americans.

The joy of the story comes from the transformation of each of the characters as they slowly discover more about the country and, in turn, more about themselves. Graham’s discovery is especially touching, while Jean’s takes a proverbial slap in the face from her long-suffering, quasi-henpecked husband Douglas. Even young Sonny learns about life decisions thanks to his guests and the actions of his mother and girlfriend.

With the general population aging, expect to see more films in this vein … aimed at the age group who is approaching the crossroads, but not yet ready to give up living. Director John Madden (Shakespeare in Love) has delivered a charming seriocomedy, but I expect others will take a more in-depth and analytical view at some point.

SEE THIS MOVIE IF: you are after an entertaining story about some very interesting characters

SKIP THIS MOVIE IF: you are looking for an in-depth study of the crossroads senior citizens face as their careers come to an end and a path must be chosen.

watch the trailer:

THE AVENGERS (2012)

 Greetings again from the darkness. The concern coming in was that this would be like an All-Star game, which as any sports fan will tell you, is typically a massive letdown. Assembling so many super heroes and colorful characters into one movie: Captain America, Thor, Iron Man, Hawkeye, Black Widow, Nick Fury, and Loki … would probably lead to either mass confusion, a 4 hour movie, or short straws for a couple of characters. Somehow director/co-writer Joss Whedon has avoided the pitfalls and delivered a huge action film that is loads of fun for everyone, including the fanboys.

Whedon does a remarkable job of giving each character their fair share of screen time, and somehow manages to make the interaction between the characters the best part of the movie. There is some terrific dialogue and the number of quick-witted exchanges are too numerous to recount. While this would be expected from Robert Downey, Jr‘s Iron Man, I must admit to being pleasantly surprised at Chris Hemsworth‘s Thor and especially Mark Ruffalo‘s Dr Banner/Hulk. I found Ruffalo’s take on the role very interesting since he is the third actor to tackle this in the past nine years (Eric Bana 2003 and Edward Norton 2008). The movie contains quite a few laugh outloud moments, which is pretty impressive in a filled theatre.

 If you are going to combine six super heroes in a movie, you need a bad guy. A villain. Actually, a super villain. Tom Hiddleston as Loki (The God of Mischief from Asgard, and Thor’s brother) is up to the task. For me, he was a weak link in Thor, but here is a full-fledged, powerful evil mastermind looking to gain power by stealing the global power of Tesseract (Cosmic Cube), commanding an alien army, and ruling earth. Hiddleston is clearly having fun and it shows. For the movie to work at all, his plan and power must stand up to the impressive line up of good guys he is fighting. That is certainly the case.

 Scarlett Johansson as Black Widow has come a long way from her brief work in Iron Man2, and we really get to know more about Natasha the Russian spy … although her accent fades in and out. Jeremy Renner as Hawkeye seems a bit out of place, but Renner is so cool, we don’t really care. Chris Evans as Captain America does a wonderful job of taking control of the band of misfits and displays the leadership expected of a super-soldier. We even get a good dose of Agent Coulson (Phil to his friends) and Clark Gregg‘s deadpan deliver is a great addition. Samuel L Jackson (as Nick Fury) will be adding hundreds of millions more to his current record of being the highest-grossing actor of all-time.

Gwyneth Paltrow is back as Pepper Potts. Since last we saw her, she has evidently been shopping for short shorts and helping design the new Stark Tower. Natalie Portman makes a creative cameo, reprising her awful role in Thor. Stellan Skarsgard is back as a believable scientist. Powers Boothe appears as a member of the Council that Fury reports to. The great Harry Dean Stanton(at 85 yrs of age) has a comical scene as a security guard who stumbles onto Hulk’s mess. And of course, Stan Lee makes his well-deserved cameo appearance – a tradition in the Marvel movies.

Much of the credit for this must go to Joss Whedon. He may finally be out of his “Buffy the Vampire Slayer” shadow, as this movie is quite an accomplishment. Entertaining and funny for the masses, yet detailed enough for the comic book fan boys. I was thinking how much fun this would be for a 10-12 year old, and how my mind might have exploded if something like this existed in my childhood. Even comparing this to the Christoper Reeve Superman movies will help you realize just how far super heroes movies have come.  There are some holes in the story and a couple of things will have you scratching your head if you think too hard … but this one’s not about thinking.  Just sit back and enjoy!

SEE THIS MOVIE IF: you want to see the most Academy Award nominees ever assembled for a super hero movie OR you just want to have fun watching a big old summertime blockbuster with comedy, action and colorful characters

SKIP THIS MOVIE IF: you have already decided you’ll hate it … otherwise, you might actually like it

watch the trailer:

RUBY’S DREAM (aka DEAR MR WONDERFUL, 1982)

 Greetings again from the darkness.  If you are a movie geek like me, and people know that you watch an obscene number of movies each year, a frequent question you get asked is “Have you seen _____ ?“  I absolutely love this question because there is always the possibility that I am about to be turned on to some obscure, off-beat gem that has somehow eluded me all these many years.  Maybe it’s the early work of a now famous writer or director.  Maybe it’s today’s movie star in a supporting role.  Maybe it’s just a poignant story that struck a chord with your friend.  I recently answered that question about this movie via email from a trusted source.  My only real hint was his statement “Joe Pesci sings“.

It doesn’t take much research to discover that Joe Pesci was a child star and even released an album, appropriately titled “Little Joey Sings”.  Not much happened for Little Joey after that until Robert Deniro noticed him acting in a play, and immediately recommended him to Martin Scorcese for Raging Bull.  That, my friends, is what they call a big break.  Since then, Pesci has had a very solid career.  Quite often he is seen in Scorcese films, but also in comedy roles like My Cousin Vinny, Home Alone and a Lethal Weapon sequel.  But, as far as I know, there is only one movie where he actually sings on-screen.

I am sure it’s just a coincidence that I have been awakened to this film during its 30th anniversary.  It’s no mistake that The Godfather series, Casablanca and Wings have received special theatre screenings for their anniversary, yet this film lives on in anonymity.  Though it’s directed by well-known German director Peter Lilenthal (David, 1979), and filmed by famed cinematographer Michael Balhous, the movie has the look and feel of a 1970′s home movie recorded by your eldest uncle suffering from poor eyesight.  Even worse, I believe it was edited by someone’s great-grandmother who only had a pair of scissors and roll of scotch tape.  Despite these handicaps, there is a certain sweetness and likeability to the film and its lead character, Ruby Dennis, played by Joe Pesci.

 Ruby is a part owner of a bowling alley/lounge.  He is part owner with the mob.  He is nice.  They really aren’t.  Ruby has a stage act as a lounge singer … yes, he sings while people bowl!!  Ruby’s big dream is to head off to Vegas or Chicago and sing in a classy joint.  Yet, he seems to be in on the gag that he really isn’t too talented.  He lives with his sister and her son.  The sister is played by Karen Ludwig, who also played Meryl Streep’s partner in Manhattan.  His nephew is played by Evan Handler, recognizable from his role as Harry in Sex and the City.  Ruby’s girlfriend is played by Ivy Ray Browning, whose character is also an aspiring singer.  This was Ms. Browning’s only TV or movie credit.  And no, that’s not Deniro as the piano player (despite the facial similarity).

 Frank Vincent (pictured above) plays Louie, the mob liaison who tries to get Ruby to take the easy way out.  But for a guy sporting multiple gold chains, a terrible toupee and a 70′s style moustache, Ruby isn’t always the smartest guy … though he does have a good heart. The script was written by Sam Koperwas and it’s also his only writing credit.  There are so many things working against this film, yet Pesci is strong enough to make you care just enough about his Ruby, that we feel his humiliation during the film’s best sequence.  Tony Martin (pictured left) makes a cameo appearance as himself visiting Ruby’s establishment. Things don’t go so well.  Mr. Martin had quite a career as a singer and actor from the 1930′s through the 1950′s.  He married and divorced Alice Faye, and later was married to the great Cyd Charisse for 60 years.  Martin’s scene in the film is even better than the early one where Pesci is handling a live fish in the bathtub.  He later kills it off-screen with a baseball bat.  Not the last time Pesci makes use of a baseball bat in a movie.

While this is certainly not a movie that falls into the hidden gem or highly recommended category, it does have some redeeming value if you are able to ignore or chuckle at the horrendous production value … and the very mediocre singing by Joe Pesci (who also co-composed the songs in the movie).  So, embrace the opportunity when your friends ask, “Have you seen _____ ?”

 

DAMSELS IN DISTRESS (2012)

 Greetings again from the darkness. Filmmakers who see the world in an unusual way often appeal to me. Whit Stillman fits that description as evidenced by his Metropolitan and The Last Days of Disco. It’s been more than a decade since his last film, and his writing remains strong while his director’s eye may have atrophied a bit. We get a trippy, twisty maze of dialogue that is not double-entendre, but rather double-take.

The film takes place on a fictional campus named Seven Oaks College. We meet a small clique of young ladies led by Violet (Greta Gerwig, Greenberg). She has a noble life mission of “helping” young men who don’t recognize their own potential. She views this as a type of social work. Violet and her troupe are also dedicated to the high causes of perfume and fashion. They volunteer at a Suicide Prevention Center, where they seem to possess no skills other than handing out donuts and teaching tap dancing.

Violet’s followers include Rose (Megalyn Echikunwoke), Heather (Carrie MacLemore) and transfer-student Lily (Analeigh Tipton). They could be termed caricatures, but I am not sure of what. Their philosophical meanderings could be considered arrogance, but their hearts seem to be in the right place. And it’s difficult to raise much ire towards Violet when her ambition involves inventing the next international dance craze … Sambola. She even provides an oral argument on the importance of dance crazes within society.  She acts like an adviser, almost a guru … but she ends up needing guidance as much as anyone.

To watch this movie, one must be willing to give Mr. Stillman some slack in the rope. To treat suicide with a touch of glib can be dangerous, but watching Aubrey Plaza defend the importance of “clinical” depression is pretty humorous. Analeigh Tipton acts somewhat as the voice of reason for viewers. She was outstanding in Crazy Stupid Love, and seems to be finding herself as an actress. Zach Woods (The Office) has a couple of decent scenes as the campus editor of “The Daily Complainer”, Adam Brody is the boyfriend who may not be what he seems, Alia Shawkat makes a quick angry appearance, and Taylor Nichols keeps his streak alive of appearing in all of Stillman’s films.

This movie may be best viewed and enjoyed as a glimpse into the mind of Whit Stillman. As a visual film, it’s really nothing special. The interesting part is in the dialogue and delivery of those lines … plus the social commentary offered up by the dialogue. Although, please don’t ask me what point that commentary is making.

SEE THIS MOVIE IF:  you are a fan of Whit Stillman’s previous films OR you are looking for an offbeat filmmaker in the vein of Wes Anderson (minus the visual flair).

SKIP THIS MOVIE IF: you prefer the story to make a clear point and the characters speak in “normal” thoughts (neither of which happen here)

watch the trailer:

THE CABIN IN THE WOODS (2011)

 Greetings again from the darkness. Well I was not ready for the horror/zombie/slasher genre to be turned on its ear, but that’s exactly what co-writers Joss Whedon and Drew Goddard (also director) have done here. Rest assured that your favorite aspects of horror films will be lampooned, or at least parodied. There are times you will jump and laugh simultaneously, but mostly I found myself checking off the influences/targets of the filmmakers.

There is no way to comment on this film without offering up spoilers, and I will not do that. What I can tell you is that you’ll be reminded of films such as Scream, Friday the 13th, Bubba Ho-Tep, Night of the Living Dead, The Evil Dead, Saw, and dare I say, elements of the classic TV series The Twilight Zone … you know the parts where you know there is more going on than you are seeing, but you can’t quite put it all together.

 The movie starts out with a tongue-in-cheek assembly of generic characters from most horror films: the fun-loving jock (Chris Hemsworth, pre-Thor), the “bad” girl (Anna Hutchison), the “good” girl (Kristen Connolly), the brainiac (Jesse Williams), and of course the comic relief stoner waxing philosophical (a very effective Fran Kranz). This group piles into a borrowed RV and heads to the cabin. And yes, we get the obligatory stop at the run down gas station manned by the straight-from-Deliverance attendant played by tobacco-spitting Tim De Zarn.

 We learn quickly that something odd is going on and our heroes are really playthings in some kind of cosmic game being conducted at an underground lab run by Richard Jenkins and Bradley Whitford. That much is shown in the trailer and that’s the end of what I will say. After that, the choice is yours … just like in the basement.

I have no idea whether to recommend this movie, and if so, to whom.  The last 15 minutes are pure mayhem, and you will either be fully onboard with this Disneyland ride gone bad, or you will have wanted to leave for the past hour. Filmed three years ago, but caught up in studio legalities, the movie was selected for opening night at SXSW and it truly is a twisted, even demented jab at all things horror. Only you can decide what comes next.

SEE THIS MOVIE IF: your twisted, demented movie-watching personality has made you a horror/zombie/slasher expert and you don’t mind Whedon and Goddard poking a little fun at your genre … just don’t blame me.

SKIP THIS MOVIE IF: I didn’t just describe you in the “See” section

watch this trailer … or don’t, if you are planning to see the movie:

FOOTNOTE (Hearat Shulayim, Israel, 2011)

 Greetings again from the darkness. In the United States, we typically get limited access to the films of Israel. In recent years, there have been two that I like very much: The Band’s Visit, and Waltz for Bashir. Written and directed by Joseph Cedar, Footnote was nominated for the Best Foreign Language Academy Award. It’s a very creative and insightful story utilizing slight comedic elements to show the destructive forces of petty professional jealousy within a family.

Most parents wish for true happiness for their children. If the professional success of their offspring far exceeds their own … it is a reason to swell with parental pride. But what happens when father and son choose similar career paths? What happens when animosity builds as the father’s life work (30 years of research) is deemed unnecessary and irrelevant? What happens when the son becomes publicly revered and adored for his populist writing? Well, in the case of father Eliezer (Shlomo Bar-Aba) and son Uriel (Lior Ashkenazi), we get strained relations and a thesis on the pitfalls of pride and ego.

 All of that is sufficiently fascinating for a story, but here we get an even more severe test of human nature. The father is erroneously informed that he has won the prestigious Israel Award, providing vindication and meaning to his work and well, his being. See, the award was supposed to go to the other Professor Shkolnik … yes, his son. This much is shown in the trailer, but the true guts of this story is what happens after this mistake.

There are a few impactful scenes in the film, but two really jumped out for me. In a very early scene, the son is receiving yet another reward and he is attempting to provide some credit for his father’s inspiration. However, the words seem to add credence to his irrelevancy instead. The best part? The camera never leaves the face of the father as he sits quietly listening in immeasurable pain. The other scene takes place in a beyond cramped meeting room for the Award committee to discuss the mistake with Uriel. The manner it is filmed and the choreography more than make up for the fact that the group of brilliant academics never thought to find a more suitable meeting place.

The score of the film is one that I would appreciate more without having the film playing. The music is wonderful, but often distracting to the moment. It is interesting to note how it changes along with the posture and walking pace of Eliezer after he is informed of his award. One need not be an academic researcher or writer to understand the damaged relationship between father and son … and how it has impacted wives, mothers and sons. That’s a story that is painful in any language.

SEE THE MOVIE IF: you want to see an insightful Israeli film exposing the dangers of misplaced ego and pride within the family circle.

SKIP THE MOVIE IF: selfish parents or competitive contempt are subjects you prefer to avoid … in any language

watch the trailer:

SALMON FISHING IN THE YEMEN (2012)

 Greetings again from the darkness. This is one of those times where I am going to be somewhat critical of a movie that is based on a book I haven’t read. That doesn’t change my belief that this movie is stuck in the gray area between romantic drama and comedy, and because of it, comes across as just a lightweight film with no real message or emotion. For this, the director Lasse Hallstrom gets the accusatory glance. His history with Chocolat and Dear John are examples of how his fondness for all things mushy gets in the way of real story-telling.

The best parts of this movie are the comedic elements. Stuffy British fish expert Ewan McGregor has some really funny deadpan moments and his inner office battles with his boss wreak of truism. Same with Kristin Scott Thomas, who plays the Prime Minister’s Press Secretary as if she were told this was a screwball comedy. She is funny and over the top, and was probably horrified when she saw the final version of the movie.

 The story is quite creative and interesting – a Yemeni Sheikh (Amr Waked, Syriana) has a vision of creating a vast green-land around a man-made freshwater river where Salmon spawn and feed the community. Unfortunately, the story leaks to the locals that this Sheikh with too much money is playing God just to satisfy his fishing hobby. Local rebels get involved in trying to stop the Sheikh and the project. Meanwhile, this Sheikh spouts off wisdom and advice as if he just finished reading the greatest hits of Confucious.

To bring this fishy project to fruition, the Sheikh enlists the British government’s help and that’s how Ms. Thomas, Mr. McGregor and a wonderful Emily Blunt get involved. We see early on that McGregor is stuck in a loveless marriage to a witch (figuratively speaking) played by Rachael Stirling (who may have the deepest voice of any actress since Lauren Bacall). Blunt’s character is a bit desperate for love and falls quickly for a soldier (Tom Mison) who is shipped off to war. So when Blunt and McGregor first meet … it seems destiny that these two opposites will attract.

 The scenery here is pretty impressive – especially the Scottish castle that houses the team for a brief period. I was just continually frustrated that more insight wasn’t provided into what makes this Sheikh tick. Is he truly the visionary he claims? If so, why? What did the locals really think of the project and was any effort made to deliver the long term vision? If not, why? Why did Blunt fall so quickly for this soldier? Just because they had fun in bed? Seems a bit shallow for someone who can peer into the soul of a nerd like McGregor. And why did McGregor ever fall for this ice-queen he married? Makes no apparent sense.

Simon Beaufoy‘s screenplay of Paul Torday‘s novel delivers a few good chuckles, but mostly leaves us wanting a real direction for the story and bit more depth of character. It’s always frustrating when a promising premise leaves us fighting so hard to swim upstream … just like the salmon and characters of the film.

SEE THIS MOVIE IF: if your favorite movie genre is non-descript love stories OR you have been anxiously awaiting a film with a lead character who is a fish expert

SKIP THIS MOVIE IF: you are looking for an expert comedy or an expert love story

watch the trailer:

21 JUMP STREET (2012)

 Greetings again from the darkness. The original 1987-91 TV series “jump” started Johnny Depp‘s mega-superstardom career, and yes, he is a generous enough to appear in a brief cameo in this updated film from co-directors Phil Lord and Chris Miller. The script from co-writers Michael Bacall and Jonah Hill makes little effort to stay true to the source material and that works in the film’s favor.

We first meet Schmidt (Jonah Hill) and Jenko (Channing Tatum) as polar opposites at the same high school. One of them is a pudgy, nerdy looking guy trying hard to throw down an Eminem look, while the other is the ultra-cool jock who is skating by academically. Guess which is which? Flash forward seven years and these two are still misfits … this time at the police academy where one aces the physical fitness tests and bombs academically and the other is just the opposite. Guess which is which? So these two decide to become buddies and help each other live the dream as badass cops.

 Cut to the next scene where they are patrolling a park on bicycles and visualizing their first big bust. When things go wrong … SURPRISE! … they are assigned to Captain Dickson (Ice Cube), an angry man who runs the Jump Street undercover unit out of a Korean church. Since neither Hill nor Tatum look anything like high schoolers, the absurdity is written into the script. They become the most mis-matched brothers since Schwarzenegger and Devito in Twins.

Their mission is to discover the dealers and source for a new drug making its way through a local high school. The drug has already killed one student and it takes these two “brothers” about 5 minutes to uncover the dealers, a group of popular rich kids. The supplier is a bit slower to come and the process involves numerous comedy skits involving Tatum as a science geek and Hill as Peter Pan.

 The comedy skits involve nice work from Elle Kemper, Nick Offerman, Rob Riggle and Chris Parnell. The cool kids are played by Dave Franco (James’ brother) and Brie Larson. Car chases, a keg party, science experiments and the prom all play a role, as do white tuxedos and one of the oddest shootouts ever filmed. What seems like 1200 rounds are fired in a hotel room before someone is actually hit.

In addition to Depp’s pretty cool cameo, there are also appearances from Peter DeLuise and Holly Robinson Peete, both of whom starred in the original TV series. Of course the story is ridiculous and the film never really takes itself seriously, but I was actually somewhat impressed with Channing Tatum’s ability to play deadpan to Jonah Hill’s slapstick. The two worked pretty well together and there are enough laughs to make this one worth seeing.

SEE THIS MOVIE IF: you want to see Channing Tatum generate some laughs (purposefully this time) OR you just need some mindless giggles

SKIP THIS MOVIE IF: you are expecting a tribute to the original TV series OR you are a fan of realistic police dramas

watch the trailer: